How I Lost My Mind, But Gained A Purple Flower
Every once in awhile, I will fast and go to one of the local parks to write. I decided to do that today, choosing Caroline Park. (I did not actually write anything, because I had a book in my car that I had intended to return to its rightful owner yesterday, but that didn’t actually happen, and today I suddenly thought, “Hey, what if I actually read it first?”)
Anyway, I went to sit down on a bench at the top of a long grassy slope, and suddenly the thought occurred to me, “Run to the bottom of the hill and back.”
“What?”
“Run to the bottom of the hill as fast as you can, then turn around and come back.”
“Why?“
“Why not?”
Well, I couldn’t argue with that logic… so I put down my stuff, then I sprinted down the slope and about two thirds of the way back up. Perhaps it would have been better if I could have done the uphill first, but I am out of shape. I made my way panting to the bench.
“Alright God, what was the point of that?”
“Nothing.”
“What?!”
“Nothing.”
I’ve got to stop talking to myself.
So I started the book, and about an hour and a half later, “Do it again.”
“No.“
“Do it again.”
“Is there a point this time?:
“Yes.”
“Promise?”
“Yes.”
Well, I choose to ignore that for awhile, but when I finished the chapter that I was had been reading…
“Do it again.”
Alright fine. But I ran downhill more slowly this time, and was able to make it pretty much back to the top. “Alright now, what was the point of that?”
“Roll down the hill.”
“Excuse me?”
“Roll down the hill.”
“I’m not going to do that.”
“You did the other things…”
So I emptied my pockets, firmly convinced that I was losing my mind… but it’s not as though I was really using it anyway.
The rolling didn’t work out so well. I kept turning so that I was heading for the edge of the lawn rather than down the slope, never really got the momentum that I had expected, and besides the grass had a lot of prickly weeds in it. I got maybe a quarter of the way down. “Ok, I did it. Now what was the point of all this?”
“It’s Monday. Most people have to work for a living while you are out rolling in the grass. So why don’t you SHUT THE F*** UP!”
Something about the phrasing leads me to believe that this was not the Voice of God, but point taken.
“Now run to the bottom again, but this time, bring back one of those purple flowers.”
“Come on…”
“You like purple.”
“This is ridiculous.”
“DO IT!”
So, now I have a purple flower.